Whensday 01/11/2012
I was telling my kids a story about my own childhood the other day, and it had my husband in stitches. I’m not sure why, but for what it’s worth, here’s the story. When I was a kid, I was a pretty picky eater. Oh, who am I kidding? I still AM a picky eater! Although I’m not nearly as bad as I was as a kid. Anyway, in addition to my being a picky eater, my mother was a horrible cook. She did criminal things to food, I kid you not. How much of her bad cooking contributed to me being a picky eater, one will never know. One time, I must have been around 10 or 11, she made something for my dinner that – best as I can recall, was either mushrooms or Brussels sprouts. It was round and slimy, I remember that, and I would not eat it. It looked weird, it smelled awful, and it was slimy. No way. Would. Not. Eat. I can be a stubborn girl when I have a mind to. My mother yelled at me, threatened me, all kinds of things she told me would happen if I didn’t eat the science experiment reject in front of me. Eventually she picked up a piece of whatever it was off my plate and tried to shove it in my mouth. Oh no, we are so not going there! I clasped my hand over my mouth as an extra barrier of protection. This was a battle of epic proportions! My mother, in her rage and frustration, leaned over and bit my hand, the hand covering my mouth. She bit me! I remember screaming, and I had a set of lungs on me too, it’s a wonder the neighbors on the other side of the wall didn’t call the police. At this point in the story, Darc busted up laughing. I mean to tell you, he almost had tears running down his face, and that’s quite a feat of accomplishment for me! Usually I’m the one splitting a gut at his stories. “Why are you laughing?” I asked him. “My knuckles were bloody and had teeth marks and everything!” I try to remember that my beloved is a writer of horror fiction so things often strike him in a way they don’t other people. “Oh my gosh,” he replied, “‘Eat or be eaten!’ That’s just priceless.” I guess it does have sort of a vampire quality to it. Eat or be eaten. Who knows? Maybe I’ll make it into one of his stories yet! 
CommentsBob 01/11/2012 8:25am
I didn't know you had a new site! 01/11/2012 9:25pm
I do! I got one the same time Darc got his. :) We're in the process of looking for a host though, and using different software. This'll do in the meantime. :) Oh, God that's funny. That's <em>funny</em>! It was like some twisted sense of Darwinism at work. Only the wrong one was being victimized. REVERSE Darwinism! 01/11/2012 9:27pm
I'm glad it made you laugh! Onyx 01/11/2012 10:58pm
She bit you?! Holy! 01/12/2012 3:32am
Yep - crazy, isn't it? Onyx 01/12/2012 7:33pm
Oh the nursing bites... *shudder* 01/18/2012 3:14am
@Onyx - I am SO sorry you went through that! So unnecessary and uncalled for! It just adds so much more pressure on a new mommy that she simply doesn't need. Leave a Reply |
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